The human mind is truly remarkable, but it's not always programmed to make us happy or fulfilled. In fact, it often holds us back with outdated beliefs and rules that no longer serve us. These nonsense rules are usually passed down from generation to generation. But what if we could break free from those limitations and live an extraordinary life? In his book, The Code of the Extraordinary Mind, Vishen Lakhiani teaches how you can avoid falling into the traps and pitfalls that your own mind may create. So, how can we take back control from our minds? In this summary, I’ll share with you three key lessons that I learned from the book.
Key Lesson #1: Question society’s bullshit rules and make your own path
We're all constantly bombarded with rules and norms that dictate how we should live our lives, from what jobs to pursue to how we should dress and look. These outdated beliefs make up what Vishen calls the "culturescape". But to be truly extraordinary, you need to step beyond these limitations. Vishen realized this when he was living in Malaysia and following the cultural expectation to become an engineer, lawyer, or doctor. Even though he succeeded in becoming a computer programmer, he realized that wasn't the life he truly wanted. To be extraordinary, Vishen knew he needed to question the rules that didn't serve him and selectively choose which ones to follow. That's where the concept of a "Brule" comes in – It’s a Bullshit rule. This is a rule that is no longer useful and we blindly follow it, even though it may hold us back from reaching our full potential. For example, they tell that we need a college degree to guarantee success, but that's not always the case. Steve Jobs dropped out of college and still went on to become a highly successful innovator who revolutionized multiple industries. So, if you want to live an extraordinary life, you need to transcend the culturescape and question the bullshit rules that may be holding you back. You should make your own path and let go of the stupid useless rules.
Key Lesson #2: Work on upgrading your mind’s operating system
Think of your mind like a computer. Just like you need to update your computer's operating system, you also need to update your mind's operating system as well. This is what consciousness engineering is all about - the ability to update and improve your mind. Your mind's operating system is where you hold your beliefs about the world - from politics and economics to marriage and schooling. If you want to be extraordinary, you need to practice consciousness engineering and update your mind's operating system. This means you need to rewrite your models of reality and create a self-encouraging mindset that helps you achieve your goals and build positive self-esteem. Vishen talks about how he had a low self-esteem mindset when he was younger. He wore thick glasses and suffered from terrible acne, which made him feel unattractive and not good enough. But that all changed one night in college when he found himself talking to the prettiest girl in the room at a party. She told him that he was one hot dude, and it was like a switch flipped inside Vishen. That experience allowed Vishen to update his operating system and build a new and encouraging model of reality that told him he was now an attractive man. It changed the way he saw himself and the way others saw him too. His dating life took off, and he started living an extraordinary life. We can all update our operating system, just like we update our computer's operating system. To do this, you need to question the rules and beliefs that hold you back and selectively choose which ones to follow. By doing so, you can create a reality that works for you and helps you achieve your dreams. This is the key to becoming an extraordinary person.
Key Lesson #3: Strive to be unfuckwithable by finding your calling in life
All extraordinary people have goals. But their motivation for reaching them comes from within. They don’t seek validation from others, and their sense of self-worth and happiness is not attached to outside values. To be unfuckwithable, you need to realize that you depend only on yourself and that nothing anyone says or does can stop you from achieving your goals. It's a state of mind that allows you to stay focused on your own path and not be deterred by external forces that might try to discourage you. For that, you need to have self-fueled goals that aren’t dependent upon others. Say you decide on a goal of being closer to your children. What happens when your children naturally desire to be more independent? The success of this goal depends on their cooperation. A better goal is to simply try to be the best parent possible. Since this is a self-fueled goal, nobody can stop you from achieving it. Extraordinary people usually have a calling – a quest to create positive change and make a meaningful contribution to the world. Work is not something that keeps them from pursuing their dreams; in fact, it’s quite the opposite. Think about Richard Branson. He’s a great entrepreneur and a perfect example of an extraordinary person. He found work that was completely in line with his calling and created a life that he could embrace completely. People who have found their calling are often more fulfilled and motivated in their daily lives. It gives them a sense of direction, and a reason to get up every day and work towards something bigger than themselves. As a result, they become unfuckwithable and independent of the good and bad opinions of others.
So, in summary, anyone can live an extraordinary life. You have the power to rewrite your models of reality and become the extraordinary person you were meant to be. Start by questioning the bullshit rules that society wants us to blindly follow and let go of the ones that are not useful anymore. Work on constantly upgrading your mind’s operating system by consciously adopting the beliefs that work for you. And finally, find your calling in life and make yourself unfuckwithable and independent of the opinions of others.